My name is Frannie Cavanaugh and I’m a senior at Hades—I mean Haden High. Mr. Snyder assigned an interview for English class. He said we could interview anyone, real or fictional. I’m interviewing Luc and Gabe and I’ll leave it up to him decide which they are, real or not.
Me: First off, how did you both know the deal with me. I didn’t even know the deal with me…
Gabe: *raises an eyebrow and quirks half a smile* Either did Mr. Arrogant. *tips his head at Luc*
Luc: *glares at Gabe* What featherface means to say is that we have our ways.
Gabe: *leans back in chair* And my ways are far superior to his ways. *smirks*
Luc: *red lightning crackles over knuckles*
Me: Okay. *panicking a little* Play nice. I was just asking. So…tell me about how you guys met.
Luc: *barks out a laugh* Go ahead, Gabriel. Fill her in.
Gabe: *shifts in chair as eyes narrow* He *juts his chin toward Luc* shows up in Pompeii after Vesuvius, thinking he’s all that. Going to collect all these souls—
Luc: *laughs again* No, idiot. The first time. *leans in and winks* You’ll have to excuse him. Brain damage from breathing all that ozone. What he meant to say was that I kicked his ass in the Colosseum.
Gabe: Stop telling her what I mean. *shakes head*
Me: Hold up! Did you say Colosseum? As in Rome?
Luc: I did. *eyes flash* *slow grin* And I also said I kicked his ass.
Gabe: *rolls eyes* In your dreams.
Luc: If memory serves me, I left the Colosseum under my own power.
Gabe: You don’t think Caesar would have thought it a bit strange that I should get up and walk out—
Luc: *grinning*—after I kicked your ass? Yeah, that might have raised suspicion.
Gabe: *glares again*
Me: Okay! Okay…I got it. So…changing the subject…what are your respective jobs in Heaven and Hell.
Luc: I work in—
Gabe: I believe she said Heaven first, dude. But I’m sure with your limited intellectual capacity, that flew right over your head.
Luc: *leans back and laces fingers behind head* I assumed it was an oversight.
Gabe: *turns his back to Luc* I’m a Protector of the Second Sphere. It’s my job to protect innocent people…*leans forward and covers my hand with his* special people…from him *jerks head toward Luc* and his kind.
Luc: …and, as I was saying before I was so rudely interrupted, I work in Acquisitions—mostly in high school. I get them going on the little ones. Starter sins, if you will. Not enough to tag their souls for Hell, but enough to send them in our direction eventually.
Luc: *smiles wickedly* It has it’s perks.
Gabe: *rolls eyes*
Me: So, I’m still not really sure what the big deal is and why you both want to tag my soul, but what will happen if you fail?
Luc: *shifts uncomfortably in his chair* *eyes flash* I never fail.
Me: Okay, but hypothetically, if you did…
Luc: *shifts again and won’t look at me* I’d spend eternity burning in the Fiery Pit.
Me: That sounds…not good.
Gabe: *scowls at Luc* You’re a demon. How bad can it be?
Me: What about you? *turns toward Gabe* What would happen if Luc wins?
Gabe: *staring hard into my eyes* The end of the world as you know it.
Me: *clears throat and squirms a little* Oh… Is that all… *clears throat again* Okay, so…last question. Can you guys, like, read minds, and transport and stuff like that?
Gabe: One of us can read minds, *smiles smugly* and it’s not brimstone breath.
Luc: *glares at Gabe* But we both can transport. *eyes shift to me* And one of us can possess people, *grins* which, really, is much more fun than reading minds.
Me: *trying hard not to think of anything totally embarrassing* Oh…okay…well, that’s all I had, so—
Luc: *pushed back from table* *holds hand out to me* Let’s go.
Gabe: *stands* *glares at Luc* Not going to happen.
Me: *splits a glare between them* I’m not going anywhere. Gotta write this interview up.
Luc: *grabs my wrist* *glares at Gabe* She’s coming with me.
Gabe: *grabs my other arm* Not even in your dreams.
Luc: Back off. *shoves glowing red fist in Gabe’s face*
Me: *shakes off Gabe’s hand* *grabs Luc’s arm* *throws Luc over my shoulder onto the floor* *glares down at him* Don’t let the door hit you on the way out.
Luc: *stands* *glares at Gabe* *storms out*
Gabe: Later. *follows Luc out*
Me: *rolls eyes* Well, that was fun.